by Lisa Kneller
Are any of you tired of reading and hearing about all those great couples who are working the business together? One specializes in one aspect of the business and one handles the other stuff. They're a TEAM and they just LOVE it!!! Come on...
Don't get me wrong, I don't begrudge them for their success. And for those couples working the business together reading this, this will help you and your organization too. It's just that I have been in this business for so long without a spouse, that it wouldn't even fit into my wildest fantasy to have my husband work this business with me.
The last company convention I attended, I said to one of my business partners, "Did you notice that all those people on stage are either married or single?" He laughed and called me blonde once again as he replied, "duh...yeah, I know what you mean."
It's true. It seems that the most successful people in network marketing are either married and working this thing together, or are single and can do whatever they please - with no one to answer to. So, we "married but single" in the business have a challenge, and that is to thrive in our network marketing business while making sure our marriage doesn't crumble. Is this possible, you ask? I believe it is.
In my situation, I struggled for years trying to get rich in my last business opportunity. My husband constantly fought me. It doesn't help that he's an attorney and files bankruptcies for loads of people. It also doesn't help that he used to regulate fraud for the state and saw a gazillion Ponzi schemes. Still, I fought for network marketing, because I believed in it.
I believe in the industry now more than ever. It is filled with the best entrepreneurial life has to offer. Once in love with leverage, always in love, but watch out! Don't let your love for network marketing ruin your marriage.
If you are struggling with your spouse or significant other regarding this issue, take heart. There is a way to stay happily married AND have a thriving network marketing business. First you'll need to come to come to grips with a few things.
This business isn't for everybody - like 95% of the people you come into contact with. Keep in mind, your partner could very well be in that 95% - EVEN IF you see eye to eye on lots of other issues. This one's different!
Marriage comes first. So, always keep your spouse's feelings and opinions about things in the forefront of your mind. You are supposed to put him/her first. That doesn't mean you are always second. Marriage, of course, is give and take. But your spouse has a right to his feelings, right?
If there are things associated with your business that your partner hates, find out why, and determine if those things are absolutely necessary for adding to your bottom line. For example, let's say you're attending two meetings per week (at night) for opportunity meetings and trainings. Your spouse is then either alone or responsible for the children. Is the time spent at those meetings productive enough to justify your time away from your family? Are you just spending time there because you like being with your friends or just like getting out? That's just one example. Here's another one that gets on people's nerves: being on the phone ALL the time. Are you on the phone all the time? Have you set boundaries for your business that protect your family time?
Don't blame your spouse for your failure! If your business isn't growing, it isn't her fault - unless she physically stops you from talking to people! Make sure you have a business plan and that you are working effectively on your daily plan of action. Do only those activities that will add to your bottom line. It's hard to argue when the business is bringing in money.
Find someone in your downline or upline or even crossline who is in the same boat. Don't spend a lot of time commiserating, but do find someone you can vent to from time to time. Believe me, you are not alone. I have a girl- friend who lives with her sister. Her sister is not too supportive of her network marketing business, so when she's feeling a bit frustrated, she calls me and we talk it out. We both feel better and then move on.
Don't envy happily married couples who are successfully working the business together. You are given your own challenges for a reason. Use them for your own personal growth.
Maintain the highest level of integrity and become the most knowledgeable you can about the industry. Knowledge is power and it will help you grow your business.
Use your time well. Make sure you schedule plenty of time with your spouse and children. Never let your spouse think that the business is more important than him. Find ways of letting him know that he's the reason you're pursuing this business.
It can be really tough when those closest to you don't share your vision. Your vision can be so far out there that they just can't imagine ever seeing that level of success. It's okay. Share your vision with your team and with those thinking of joining you. Keep it in front of you in writing and read it often. Place your vision with pictures in a dream book.
But if you want to prove to your spouse that this is going to work, then you better get to work. Get your plan and have some major activity going on, and things will start happening. Find a mentor, have a business plan, make sure you are accountable, set goals, have a daily plan of action and stay busy doing productive things that will lead to building your bottom line.
I want to add one thing. If you are having marriage trouble and it seems to be your business that's causing it, get some professional counseling. It may not be the business, but some other area that's been neglected or abused. Your marriage can always benefit from an objective guide who specializes in helping couples work things out.
Above all, remember that Love is patient, kind, not envious, boastful or rude; it does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, endures all things. It never ends.
Why do you think that famous passage is always read at weddings?
LOVE God, your spouse, your marriage, your kids and WORK your business. It will all fall into place!
Lisa Kneller is a veteran network marketer and home based business builder. Her web site, www.thewealthinstructor.com offers options for home based-business building with internet-work marketing. For more information on MLM, send a blank email to firstname.lastname@example.org